


Vriska Takes A Giant Shit

by HitherDither



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Farting, Other, Scat, that's pretty much it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:20:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24380443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HitherDither/pseuds/HitherDither
Summary: Vriska enjoys access to tons of free food spanning over several days. It all has to come out sometime.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 18





	Vriska Takes A Giant Shit

**Author's Note:**

> This is very much a "what it says on the tin" situation. Beware of tags.
> 
> I've tried writing this fic like four times and it never came out right. This time, I think I got it.
> 
> The title stuck in my head one day so I wrote a fic to go along with it.

It was a time for celebration, and you couldn’t even enjoy it. Three days had already passed where you’d spent hours in other people’s homes, gorged on their free food, and watched tons of violence on televisions that you didn’t have to pay a subscription to. Now that you were on the fourth day, looking at the plate of food balanced on your lap made you slightly nauseous, and you weren’t much interested in the two trolls beating the shit out of each other on the big flat screen in front of you.

Nothing seemed to be bothering the room of your peers, both human and troll- most of whom were screaming at the television in either righteous cheers or harsh booing. The ones who weren’t making any noise were either stuffing their faces with party snacks or counting blows for the betting pool. This week of absolute gladiatorial style smackdown only aired once a year! Everyone had to take advantage of it!

That’s what you did, after all. Then again, maybe losing your head over an all-expense-paid week of entertainment was catching up to you.

Your stomach yowled ominously. The plates of deep-fried meats you’d wolfed down continuously for the last seventy-two hours had yet to leave their post, leaving you with a protruding stomach that made your shirt pull up around your middle. At this point your pants were so tight that you’d had to unzip them and put on a loose belt to keep them up. It was expected to gain a few pounds around this time of the year, but not like this.

God, you didn’t want to give up your spot! Primo location, straight in front of the screen, on the most well-worn part of the overstuffed couch. Any more to the left and you’d be sucked in by the cushions with their misaligned stuffing- any more to the right and you’d be on the verge of falling face first for the same reason. “Move your feet, lose your seat” was the overreaching rule and there was no way you’d get it back.

Your eyes squinted at the television. None of the action was catching your attention anymore, your mind being distracted by the unpleasant fullness of your entire abdomen. The stuff on your plate was going cold and you didn’t think you had it in you to even put one piece of it in your mouth. The more you sat there, the more you became uncomfortably aware of the shifting of your guts.

God damn it, this was no way to have fun. You knew you couldn’t win this battle. Standing up, you placed your paper plate on the couch and glared at your closest neighbor. “If you let *anyone* touch this seat, you’ll look like the guy in the last round.”

Tavros, mouth full, gave you a harsh side glance and there was no mistaking his quiet message of “Fuck off”.

You can’t win them all.

At least you knew where the bathroom was without having to interact with anyone else. You’d been to Equius’ hive before, and after rounding a worktable and walking down the hall you found the door thankfully open. Once inside, you locked it and started fiddling with your belt.

All at once, you were glad you’d finally given in when you did. The pressure in your intestines dropped like a stone, and a ripping fart let loose that howled against the walls and sent warmth shooting down your pant legs. As big as it was, your discomfort didn’t ease a bit. Once you pulled down your pants and sat on the waiting toilet, you were left staring at the sink in front of you. And worse, at your reflection in the mirror above it. What a goddamn stupid place to put that.

You should have had the forethought to bring your phone. At least then you’d have something to do other than wait around for your body to do its thing. Looking around, you spotted a few different bottles of soap, shampoo, and conditioner. Was it surprising or obvious that he had expensive taste in those care products?

The walls of the bathrooms echoed with the churning of your insides. They were working hard on something, and after a few long minutes you finally felt that unmistakable urge to push it all out. Disappointingly, nothing happened.

It was stuck. Oh, fuck.

I really need to work on a better diet, you kept telling yourself.

Shifting your hips, you tried again, and at least got somewhere this time. It was clear now why you’d gone so long without taking a shit- it was _huge_. Sweat was starting to bead on your forehead. This was going to be rough.

Widening your hips to a better stance and clenching your abdominal muscles, you tried again. It went from uncomfortably tight to painful as your load moved down even lower and stretched the opening of your ass. Now this had turned from a waiting game into a fight- your body needed this out right now, but you had to do it carefully.

Sucking in a deep breath, you felt your muscles pull tight and release, almost entirely out of your control. The urge to contract your stomach and fire it out was immensely strong, but so was your desire to not experience any more pain. Slowly but surely managed to yourself into a cycle tensing and relaxing yourself, and it wasn’t long before you felt it working its magic.

Bit by bit, things were moving along. You still felt the stinging pain of being stretched out to your limit, but it didn't seem like you were going to split yourself in half anymore. Every muscle in your body was tense and on edge, and your claws were planted firmly into anything they could reach on either side of the toilet: in this case, the roll of toilet paper, and a towel laying in the tub. There was a dull crinkling sound as the cardboard tube in the toilet paper was crushed by your grip.

It didn't take long at all for the pain to start to ease, the hard part seemed to have passed. At that very instant of safety, your body acted of it's own accord. There was an unstoppable urge to push down and evacuate your bowels that rushed through you, and you clenched down hard. Hard shivers of relief ran up your spine as you felt everything drop out. There was a loud, satisfying splash that unfortunately was big enough to hit your bare ass. You breathed loud through your nose from your effort, from victory.

But a second had barely crawled by before you realized that _this wasn't over_. Your stomach was still largely full, and you could feel the shifting of matter inside your intestines. Now that the plug had been pulled, things were really starting to move. You gripped your bulging abdomen gently as a light cramp passed through your gut, and another fart blasted out and echoed against the inside of the toilet. It was like a mini amphitheater, and amplified the sounds to be that much louder. It was a small bit of relief, but you could tell that there was more to come.

You set your teeth against your lower lip and felt the urge to clench up again. It wasn't painful this time, and everything slid out easily, punctuated by small puffs of gas. Everything had been so tightly packed inside of your stomach for the last few days that it didn't seem like it would end. Little beads of sweat formed on on your forehead and shivers worked across your skin as wave after wave of relief hit you. It felt almost as enjoyable as devouring all that food in the first place.

A loud knock snapped you out of your thoughts. The words “You're taking forever!” were shouted through the door. You couldn't immediately place the voice and honestly you didn't care. Steeling yourself, you clenched your abdomen again and let out a deafening roar of a fart that felt _soooooooo_ good. The visitor did not deign to continue their irritation and had hopefully fucked right the hell off.

Tenderly, you felt your stomach, and were astonished to sense the massive difference that this had all made. That tight, bloated feeling was gone entirely, and the small shifting and bubbling sensations were gone. You felt like you'd passed an army out of your ass but that was worth it. There was now room for you to continue the party and get right back into the buffet.

Your legs were a little wobbly and numb when you stood up to clean yourself off. That didn't bother you very much, but you were stopped cold after turning to reach for the lever on the toilet. It was absolutely, undeniably packed. Full. Completely choked. It looked like way more than just a few day's eating, but then again you _had_ been gluttonously attacking every piece of freely available sustenance. A little bead of sweat ran down your back- there was probably a line out there, and what was your next step here supposed to be?

Even though you knew it was fruitless, you flushed the toilet. The water ran, and it tried to do it's work, but it only ended up as a helpless clog right off the bat. There was no saving face at this point, unless you chose to camp out in here for the rest of your life.

Huh.

You did all you were able to do: pulling up your pants and washing your hands. Your zipper was all the way up and the buttons were done, which was a world of difference. The belt was snugly fit and would once again be thrown into your closet and forgot about. After your hands were cleaned, you dried them off and straightened your posture. You glared at yourself in the mirror, fixing your attitude for what would come outside that door.

Moving quickly, you pulled open the door and stared straight ahead as you strode out. Instead of walking into the visitor who had so rudely interrupted you, you ran straight into the host: Equius. You stared him down and he stepped out of your way, his hands full with a towel and a basket of cleaning supplies. Of course, he was probably making sure the whole hive was up to his standards when company was around. Minus all those metal scraps and oil patches.

You'd made a good few strides away when you heard the unmistakable sound of plastic and cans hitting the floor. Turning quickly, you saw him pulling himself out of the bathroom and staring at you with surprised incredulity. His mouth opened but before he could utter a word you cut him off.

“You really should have thought about upgrading your plumbing before you had guests over. Such a pity! I guess everyone else will just have to go next door if they need the restroom. I hope they don't take the party with them!” You spun back around before he had a chance to reply, squared your shoulders, and walked away.

You had a plate of food to eat, a show to watch, and possibly an ass to kick out of your spot.


End file.
